ARLINGTON, VA — For months, the Transportation Security Administration has been deploying backscatter x-ray technology to major airports in the United States in an effort to provide better security for the millions of passengers that fly every day. Recently, the TSA has come under fire from health and privacy advocacy groups who claim that the backscatter x-ray machines cause unjustifiable levels of radiation exposure and that passengers who do not submit to the backscatter x-ray are subject to invasive pat downs from a TSA security officials.
Today, the TSA announced a new security policy in an attempt to pre-empt the National Opt-Out Day protest planned for November 24, 2010. Effective immediately, passengers will no longer be required to submit to backscatter x-rays; instead, each passenger will be issued a TSA branded taser that will be confiscated when the passenger deplanes at their destination. “In the event of a hijacking, the tasers will allow the legitimate passengers to overwhelm the hijackers with 1500 volts of pure justice” explained TSA Administrator John Pistole.
When asked if he was worried about passengers accidentally discharging their taser and hurting other passengers, Mr Pisole said “I think people will quickly learn the consequences of accidentally tasering someone who also has their own taser. Overall, this is a big win for passenger safety and security lines.” Mr. Pisole went on to say that airlines will be required to update the safety presentation given by flight attendants to include a part that demonstrates proper use of the taser.
Mr. Pisole did not comment on what would happend to the unused backscatter x-ray machines, but it is rumored that the TSA has already made arrangements to sell these excess machines to a few interested companies in the adult entertainment industry.
0 Responses to “New TSA security policy”